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— For brand new businesses, websites & services —

Make ‘em stare.

(Then let them pay you.)

Full copy & strategy that strikes the match, lights

the fuse & launches your new adventure sky high.

Investment ϟ Starting at $2,000

You’re selling to Real Live Humans.

Let’s make sure you sound like one.

Gone are the days of 8th-grade English stuffiness & leaving double spaces between sentences.

Because you don’t have to be stiff to be taken seriously — and we’re here to prove it.

Ready to sound like yourself, while scoring veritable boatloads* of new business?

*Note: Neon water safety vests not included.

“Thanks to Jess, we’ve hired 3 new people to keep up with demand.”

“Since implementing just one small portion of Jess’ words 3 months ago, we are literally so busy I can't make anything fast enough. The signs alone have increased our sales at markets by 25%.

Our business has more than doubled because of her copy, and it hasn’t even gone live on our site yet.”

— Megan Schmer
Owner | Olive & Olde’s

Full web copy

Like we did for The Failure Ball.

Home pages that attract YOUR people. About pages that breed fans. Sales pages that actually, y’know, make the sale.

Email funnels

Like we did for Kettle & Fire Bone Broth.

Why did the chicken subscribe to your email list? To be consistently floored by your genius — while you play with the profits.

Blog posts

Like we did for Acuity & Squarespace.

Gain more organic traffic with our blog posts that get proven results. We handle it all, so all you need to do is copy, paste & publish.

Packaging & print

Like we did for oVertone Hair Color.

Score the signage, posters, billboard one-liners & bold product packaging that pave the way more customers.

Pitch decks

Like we did for Levi’s Jeans.

Make it easy for investors & media outlets to say OMG, YES! more often. More personality in your pitch, less missed opportunities.

Ad suites

Like we did for the Pennsylvania govt.

From initial concepts & full copy to final image direction, we get eyes & clicks on what you care about most.

Investment ϟ Starting at $2,000

“Since Jess rewrote my site, the number of inquiries I’ve gotten has nearly tripled.”

— Lindsey Anderson
Owner | Six Leaf Design

“I truly cannot recommend Jess enough. The impact she’s had on my business is literally invaluable.”

— Shirin Eskandani
Owner | Wholehearted Coaching

The 6-Week Website

Our signature service that gets high-converting copy in your hands faster than you can say, “Holy heckeroni with a side of jeez.”

Investment ϟ $10k for everything below

Essential Strategy

Core Pages

Finishing Touches

Investment ϟ $10k

Not seeing what you need?

Custom projects and retainer situations make us do The Macarena with wanton abandon. Just holler down the well to talk details.

“When Jess changed one section on our site, we increased sign ups by a full 7.2% within weeks.”

“That increase means thousands of new users for us and more revenue down the line. Whatever you need to do to hire Jess, do it. Thank me later.”

— Gavin Zuchlinski
Founder | Acuity Scheduling

“Do you want to work with a copywriter who brings unparalleled enthusiasm — and does it right, every time?

Look no further.”

“Jess always delivered on deadline, and nailed our brand voice and tone. She integrated seamlessly with our cross-functional team, without even being in the office.

From the kickoff meeting to weekly status updates to final hand-off, Jess made working with a third party extremely stress-free and fluid.”

“With limited in-house bandwidth for copywriting projects both large and small, Jess came in CLUTCH.”

— Erin Chambers
VP Customer Acquisition & Retention
oVertone | Allure’s Best of Beauty Winner 2021

A couple little ditties

we’re proud of:

We wrote the product description for Nike’s best-selling tennis shoe of all time to celebrate its anniversary.

Of the hundreds of posts (contributed by multiple writers), out of the top 20 blogs on the Acuity Scheduling website, 16 were written by us.

The #1 most-visited blog post on Squarespace was conceived, researched, and written by us.

Our product signage for Olive & Olde's lead to a 25% increase in sales at markets and they've hired 3 new employees to keep up with demand.

Stuff you’ll want to know before giving us money:

“Not to sound like a Disney movie, but when I found Jess all my fears went away.”

“Jess has talent for SENSATIONAL copy, but also the strategy to adapt it seamlessly to our voice.

The entire process was so smooth, thoughtful, and inspired! It was such a huge relief (and even better investment) to bring Jess on. Jess has it all.

It’s been years of working together, and I absolutely refuse to use anyone else.”

— Kim Cruikshanks
Co-Owner | Cooking Giftset Co.

Never again worry if what you’ve written is good enough to get the sale.

Like — never, ever again.